Trust
by Soniaham
Summary: I'm afraid of heights. I'm afraid of heights and I'm afraid of falling. But STUPID Potter wants me to fall, and it's working. DISCLAIMER: HARRY POTTER IS NOT MINE (I WISH)
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1:** Of apricots and trains.

"GETUPGETUPGETUOGETUP GET UUUUUPPPP! IT'S YOUR BIRTHDAAAYY!"

The nerve of that kid. I was going to strangle him... As soon as I got up. Which was never. Having made that smart decision, I turned over,hugging my pillow tightly. Hmmmmm comfyy... The wonderful moment was too soon interrupted by Scorp (the stupid, stupid boy) jumping on top of me. Yes, you heard right, he jumped on top of me. _ME! _I, being the generous person I am, resisted the urge to murder him and simply rolled over again, making him fall to the floor.

"Why did you do that?" He asked. More like shouted. _Such _a drama queen.

"Ummm, because you were on top of me, maybe?"

He shrugged as I walked into the bathroom, where I showered, combed my hair, brushed my teeth, got dressed and blah blah blah. Not like you would be interested in my morning routine.

I applied some dark eyeliner to my eyes (yes, that's how cool I am) , before walking down to the kitchen, where I found Scorp inhaling a pile of pancakes. I opened a cupboard to get myself a plate, when Aunt Astoria walked in. _Oh shit. Don't see me, don't see me, please don't see me. _But of course, she did see me, and narrowed her steely grey eyes at me.

"What are you up to missy?"

I tried smiling innocently. "Getting a plate to have a pancake?" She gasped in outrage, as if I had just confessed to commiting murder.

Wrong answer? Yeah.

"A proper lady does not eat unhealthily, and much less in private." Yeeeshh. Psycho much?

"But I'm hungry." I tried to protest.

"But you're fat."

_Ouch. _The word bumped around in my head, again and again.

"Here, if you're hungry have an apricot." She said, handing me the bowl.

"Hello? I'm allergic."

"Well get over it."

Crazy, that woman was crazy. I stomped out of the room, making a point of slamming the door behind me.

"We're leaving in two minutes!" I heard Uncle Draco shout from the living room.

Pulling out my wand, I shouted an "Accio trunk!" making it fly down the stairs, and conveniently crash into Aunt Astoria, who was just coming out of the kitchen. Yay for me being of age.

I bit back a laugh as I picked up the trunk.

"Can't you even control your magic?" She screeched.

"Can't you even control the volume of your voice?" I snarled angrily, before dragging my trunk over to the living room, where Uncle Draco was watching impatiently.

Scorp walked beside me, chuckling slightly.

"Bitchy much?" I smiled.

"What can I say? I am a bitch."

Uncle Draco offered me a small bowl with the floo powder, from which I took a pinch, threw it into the fire, and stepped in, yelling "King's Cross Station."

Now that I was of age (YAYYY) I could have apparated, but Aunt Astoria thought that apparating was less classy or some dragonpoop like that, so whatever.

When we got to the platform, everyone was already waving goodbye to their families, so I made sure to bow as weirdly as humanly possible (my nose almost touched the floor and it smelled _disgusting_) to Aunt Astoria, and dragged my trunk towards the train as fast as I could, followed by Scorp.

Once on the train, Scorp stopped in the empty corridor and handed me a wrapped up... something. Curious, I unfolded the napkin to find a few cookies. Smiling slightly, I glanced up at Scorp.

"Where did you get these?"

"Found them in the kitchen, you were busy knocking Mother over with your trunk." He smiled. For a sixteen year old, he sure knew how to think about others. The wimp. Should've been in Hufflepuff. How could someone as kind as him be stuck in Slytherin? But then again, he _had _been the one to wake me up this morning, so he wasn't such a great person, really.

"Oh that was fuun. Well thanks a lot, I'm starving. Stupid Aunt Astoria."

Just then, the door from the compartment beside us slid open, to reveal a lot of redhead... people. And by a lot, I mean A LOT. The Potters and Weasleys (I refused to call them Wotters as many other people did) formed a complicated net of brothers and sisters, cousins and double cousins, that I honestly couldn't understand as hard as I tried. And I didn't try at all, so I had no idea of who was who.

Standing by the door, there were two people who -BEWARE- were not redheads.

I inspected the aliens to discover that I was staring at two people who I actually knew the name of: the Potter brothers, junior and senior. Potter Jr. (pretty sure his name is Albert or Alfred. Whatever.) was Scorp's best friend, so I normally tried not to be too nasty, though sometimes I just couldn't help myself.

The other one though, Potter Senior (a.k.a Jerk) was a danger to mankind, I'm tellin' ya.

"Knocking people over now are you, princess? I always knew you were a naughty girl."

See? That right there is Potter Sr. The devil.

"Don't call me that." I warned coldly.

"Okay then, love. Don't get your knickers in a twist."

Not bothering to come up with a response, I muttered a quick "Jerk" and adopted the HMP (high and mighty position) which consisted of me basically acting like the queen of the world, and nodded my head at Potter Jr. (Told you I was nice to him), glared at Potter Sr. and pointedly ignored the others, turning to Scorp.

"So I'm gonna try to find Liv, thanks for the provisions."

"Yeah yeah, you're welcome. By the way, I still have to give you your birthday present."

I held up the napkin that was wrapping the cookies. "This isn't it?"

He simply stared in response, at which I ruffled his hair.

"You know you're my favourite cousin, right?"

"I'm your only cousin."

"That's what _you_ think."

I waggled my eyebrows before saying "happy birthday to me" and strutting down the corridor.

After looking through a few windows, I finally found Liv in a compartment... surrounded by people.

_Get out of here_ the voice in my head told me. _Run, run for your life!_

To those of you who think I'm overreacting, well sod off, because I just couldn't handle being around that group of loud, screechy girls. But I did convince myself to swallow my pride for a bit, and slid the door open.

Liv jumped up from her seat as soon as she saw me, hugging me enthusiastically, while yelling 'happy birthday's and 'I missed you's in my ear.

She dragged me out of the compartment to the corridor, where we had a short conversation that consisted of me convincing her to be with her "friends" and letting me be alone. Anyways, I already knew all about her summer, thanks to her never-ending letters, which had been my main (and only) source of entertainment during the summer.

So, after a very tight hug goodbye, I found an empty compartment. Well fine, I'll admit it; I forced some firsties to leave, threatening their lives. But hey, it was their fault for being in the best compartment. Don't blame me!

I curled up against the window, pulling out a book and one of the cookies Scorp had given me.

And no, don't stare. I'm not expecting any pity from you, because I felt completely fine reading, on my own. Maybe I was used to it, or maybe it was just better. Being alone with a book was better than being in a compartment full of people. Books don't expect anything from you, and books don't hurt you. Books don't leave you.

I'm not sure of how much time I spent sitting there, reading while munching on one of my cookies. But I do know, that I was interrupted _way _too soon, by... Potter Sr.! Yipee (Please note the sarcasm).

He slid the door open, hair even more ruffled than usual (I didn't know it was possible but apparently I was wrong), and glasses at a weird angle as he closed the door behind him, sighing in relief. He seemed to not have noticed me.

"Hello?" I asked, staring at him pointedly.

"Oh hi, didn't see you there." He flashed me one of his winning grins, as I stared at him in disbelief.

"What are you doing here?"

"Oh you know, just dropping by for a friendly visit, princess."

"You can go now." I smiled sweetly. I was in a book-induced good mood and didn't want him to ruin it.

"Can't do that, love." He answered, always with that arrogant and hateful smirk of his.

"Why not?"

"There's a group of my fans in the corridor"

"Please tell me you're kidding?" The Potter fanclub consisted of a group of insufferable teenagers who had a way-too-creepy obsession with Potter, and followed him around EVERY SINGLE HOUR OF EVERY SINGLE DAY. No wonder everyone hated them, even Potter ran away from them.

He sat down comfortably. "I'm not. But I don't think they'll come in here, they hate you."

"Oh trust me, the feeling is mutual."

"So you're letting me stay here?"

"Only because I'm a generous bitch. Say one word and you're out."

He gave me what I guess could be called a grateful grin, but never _ever _a smile, because as everyone knew, Potter never _ever _smiled. He either smirked or grinned. End of story.

Just as I was turning to my book again, the doors to the compartment started moving (Potter had thankfully closed the curtains). So, fast as a leopard (aren't they super super fast?), I pulled out my wand and cast a disillusionment charm on Potter ('cause I'm just _that_ awesome), and turned my head to the door.

Bitch mode: ON

At the door stood Sarah Nott, second to top in my to-murder list. And let me tell you, she deserved it. Twig skinny, sharp red nails, giggly and annoying. And _of course_, she wasn't alone. Sarah Nott was _never_ alone. _Hmmm, I wonder if she showers alone. _GAHHHHH DISTURBING IMAGESSSS, OUT OUT OOUUUTTT.

_As I was saying, _behind Sarah there were at least ten other girls, all looking at me curiously. Sarah herself looked around the compartment before setting her eyes on me, face full of disgust.

"Malfoy. Have you seen my Jamesie-Poo?" I bit back laughter at the name and acted impassive.

"I'm afraid I can't help you. I'm not familiar with this Jamesie-Poo of yours."

Her eyes narrowed. Oh, how I loved annoying her.

"You know who I mean. James? James Potter? Harry Potter's son? Gryffindor seeker? Wonderfully fit? Great eyebrows?-"

"The fact that the first thing you know about him is his father's name is _weird_, and that you think his eyebrows are 'great' is simply disturbing, but whatever. I hope you find your Jamesie-Poo, but not in my compartment. Byee."

With that, I waved my wand making the compartment doors close, and very conveniently catching Nott's hair between them. When I heard her shriek in pain, I couldn't help but smirk.

"Sorry, but not sorry." I muttered, before turning to my book again.

"Nicely done, princess. Can you make me visible now?"

I didn't let him distract me from my book, as I waved my wand without even moving my eyes. You guessed right; I'm a darn good witch.

The compartment was silent for about five seconds of glory, before Jerk decided to interrupt once again.

"I'm bored."

"Jump out the window."

"Why would I do that?"

"So that I could read."

"Reading is boring."

Hearing that, my eyes snapped up to his face, narrowed into slits. "Take that back." He stared at me, with an amused expression.

"Nope."

"Do it."

"Or what?"

"I will throw you out to the blood-thirsty fangirls."

"You wouldn't."

"Oh but I would."

"_Fine_. You win. Reading is great."

"Wasn't so hard to admit, was it?" I smirked, before getting up.

"Where are you going?"

"To the restrooms. Can't a woman pee anymore? And you should change into your robes, I don't think we're far." I, being brilliant and smart as I was, had put my uniform on this morning, and now didn't have to be bothered with actually _doing _something, thank Merlin.

As I left, I could hear him answer. "Your wish is my command." I didn't dignify it with a response.

Stupid sodding Potter barging into my compartment like he ruled the world. Ugh.

The bathroom was thankfully free of make-upping bitches, so I didn't have to endure people as I stared at myself in the mirror, pinching at my too-big thighs. Double ugh.

I eventually made my way back to the compartment, to find that Potter hadn't decided to disappear mysteriously (sigh) but at least he had decided to change into his uniform.

"A prefect came by. We should be there in about half an hour."

"I don't think I'm going to survive that long." I said, sitting down again.

"My sex appeal too much for you?"

"More like the urge to murder you."

He stared at me, head slightly cocked to one side as he chuckled lightly. When I was starting to get scared by his lack of blinking, he finally said something.

"You're so... different."

Ooookay. I was not expecting that.

"I'll just take that as a compliment." I finally said, once I had recovered from the shock.

"I meant it as one."

_Weird_. I gave him an awkward half smile. "Well thanks. Now shut up."

Having finished that awkwardly -dare I say it?- _cordial _conversation, I finally returned to my book, mind still reeling from the weirdness of it all. While I read, I could see him out of the corner of my eye, pouring over some weird parchment.

What seemed like seconds later (time flies when you're enjoying peaceful silence), the train came to a stop and a raised my eyes to see Potter sleeping, mouth slightly open, and old, blank parchment still in his hand. _How utterly adorable._

"Jerk"

Nothing.

"Jerk"

"Jerk"

"POTTER"

Still nothing.

I got up, and slapped him. Hard.

"WHAT THE FUCK?" _What _an overreaction. It wasn't as if he had given me much choice, had he?

"Get off your ass. We're here."

He grumbled something that sounded very much like 'bitch', but I ignored him, too busy getting my trunk out of the compartment, Jerk following my example. Having been the last ones out of the train, we had to share the last carriage.

Jerk appeared to be in a good mood, sporting a huge (and slightly psychotic looking) smile, and jumping up and down impatiently. When he saw the castle his eyes opened wide, and his smile got even bigger. He looked like a little kid in Christmas morning.

Me, I wasn't in a good mood. Not that I ever was but shhh - it's a secret. I didn't want to go back into the mass of judgemental teenagers that did nothing but gossip and put pressure on the other teenagers. Going back to Hogwarts meant the consant feeling of being stared at, of being whispered about, of not meeting the expectations. The voice in my head whispering _you're fat, you're not good enough _always got louder and more insistent while at Hogwarts, and I didn't like it.

But I didn't want to be at the Malfoy Manor any longer. Malfoy Manor meant silent and awkward Uncle Draco, and insufferable Aunt Astoria. More judgement. It seemed that everywhere I went, the pressure to be perfect followed me, weighing down on me, and it would eventually make me fall down. I knew by now that it was too late to save myself, and who would want to save me anyway?

Oh wow. Hey. I haven't even introduced myself yet. _How rude_. My name is Rebeckah Malfoy. Nice to meet you. (Not really but whatever).

You might have realized by now that I'm a bit of a bitch. That's all you need to know. You'll learn everything about me soon enough.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2: Of teddy bears and firewhiskey**

I let out a contented sigh as I lay down in my perfect bed as soon as I got into the dorm, Liv doing the same beside me.

"Oh, sweet pillow of mine, I missed you so so much." She let out, smiling her lazy smile.

We were proud owners of the only two-person dorm in all of Slytherin House, probably even in Hogwarts. And thanks to who did we have this room? Me, of course.

Around the middle of first year, the snotty girls we called dorm mates decided that my nightmares weren't lettinng them sleep (I'd like to see _them _dealing with nightmares _every single night of their life_), so they went and complained to Professor Brams, Head of the Slytherin house and Charms teacher. So after lots of considering, she finally let Liv and I share an empty dorm, and she even let us decorate it ourselves, which we did brilliantly, if I do say so myself.

Liv soon mastered the art of sleeping deeply, so that she wouldn't be woken up, and it worked perfectly.

Conclusion: us two awesome bitches got a dorm for ourselves, while our ex-roommates had to share. Sweet revenge.

I closed my eyes. I was exhausted. Beside me, Liv moved slightly.

"You better not be falling asleep, darling. You and I, we've got things to do."

I cracked one eye open. "What exactly are you talking about?"

"Okay, so first we unpack a bit, and then it's dresses, hair, make-up, and party" She had her signature mischevious smile on her face, and glint in her eye. I wasn't escaping this.

"Party? What party?"

"Start of the year party, duh. Now let's do this."

"I really just want to sleep right now, Livvy."

"Well, you shouldn't have chosen me as your best friend, then. Plus, you're staying up all night. It's your birthday."

I sat up, my mood suddenly changed. "Well if we're doing this, we're doing it proper. Find me the sluttiest dress in your trunk."

"Now that's the spirit. You are a bitch, so you must dress accordingly."

-o0o-

And that's how, an hour later, I was wearing the shortest dress you have ever seen. The she-devil had let me do my own make-up, so that was good, but my hair was in a complicated knot that gave me headache just to think about. And believe me, I had tried to resist, but she had threatened to throw my teddy bear into the lake!

Yes, I have a teddy bear. Yes, I am so original that I called him Teddy. No, I am not childlish.

Anyways, we soon got to the Room of Requirement. Of course, most students didn't know what it actually did because: a) they didn't read history books (I didn't either. Let's face it, BORIINGG) and b) they didn't go exploring in the middle of the night. Why someone would not explore in a place like Hogwarts is beyond my comprehension.

As a result, most people though that this was just a party room, and that its door appeared conveniently every time there was a party. Oh innocent (and stupid) people.

Mon and I stepped into the room, and I looked around. On one side: the bitches. Looking around and eye fucking each and every guy they could see. They were swaying their hips to the music in what was supposed to be a sexy way. I pitied them.

On the far end: the drink table. Surrounded by people who were trying to forget their worries, or to just get piss drunk for the fun of it. It's always hard to tell.

Scattered around, were the already drunk, talking to the walls or professing their love for everyone around them.

And finally, in the middle of the room: the dancers. Some knew what they were doing. Most didn't. But still, they were dancing, and I desperately needed to join them.

But first, to the drink table.

I headed straight towards it, Mon close behind me (she was never one to say no to a drink), but of course, someone had to interrupt my quest for alcohol. Natalia Vittori.

She was one of our ex-roomies. And she hated me. Yayy.

"Malfoy. What are you doing here?"

"I'm hunting unicorns, of course."

She narrowed her eyes "dangerously" (ha, no one can scare me) "You're so funny. But tell me, how did you stuff your big fat ass into that dress?"

And there it goes again. The word. She knew that was my soft spot. She knew it. And I knew she said it to hurt me. But that doesn't mean it isn't true, does it?

_Fat_

Fat

Fatfatfatfatfat

_FAT_

_Shut up. _

_Okay, Fattie. _

I had been quiet for a moment too long, I knew it. So I smiled my too-sweet smile.

"I learned how to get dressed when I was about two, but it seems you might want to revise, looks like you've forgotten the meaning of underwear." And I'm not about to give any details, but it was true. Painfully so.

"Well Malfoy, I don't think you can say anything considering how your mudblood friend is dressed."

Quick as a leopard (I'm going to start using that expression more often), I pulled out my wand, and pointed it at her, glaring. My hands were clenched and my eyes were so narrowed I could barely see, but I still spoke calmly.

"You can make fun of how Liv dresses whenever you want, although I don't think you're one to talk. But insult her, or anyone else, because of their blood in front of me again, and you're dead meat, darling."

I petrified her silently, and watched in satisfaction as she went rigid and fell. I felt Liv's hand close around my wrist, softly pulling me away. "Come on, you little badass, let's go get a drink."

_Finally_, we got to the drinks table, where I downed a couple glasses of firewhiskey immediately. In spite of my extreme shortness, I held my alcohol really well, so I could just drink all night. But the dancing was waiting.

Liv took my hand, and dragged me to the "dance floor", somehow managing to get us to the middle of it without dying due to lack of air. Not an easy task.

"LETS DANCE, BITCHEES" I heard Liv scream. Apparently the firewhiskey was already affecting her, or maybe it was just her party mode taking over.

I smiled, closing my eyes as I focused on the music, and feeling my body beating at the same rhythm. Little by little, I let my hips lose, my body grinding against everyone's around me.

I liked the feeling of all these people moving to the same music as me. I liked the heat and energy that we emitted. I liked the feeling of alcohol in my veins, and its taste in my mouth. Yes, dancing like a slut was definitely enjoyable.

When I eventually opened my eyes, Liv was long gone, probably shagging a random guy, and a voice could be heard advertising a drinking contest. More alcohol. Yumm.

Part of the crowd headed towards the voice, and I followed to stand in line. Soon, some Hufflepuff kid lost, and it was my turn to sit down, and face the enemy. I'm sorry to disappoint but no, I didn't know his name. I did know he was pretty big and looked like a good drinker. Hmmm, shall we call him Shots-guy? Shots-guy it is. Shotty for short. He gave me a drunken smirk, as the crowd around us yelled in unison.

"One, two... Three" I downed the first shot, not breaking eye contact with Shotty.

"One, two... THREE."

"One, two... THREE"

I swallowed shot after shot, the liquid building my throat. Eventually, he collapsed. Good, I was starting to see everything just a teeny bit blurry.

I drank some more, until I won against some other guy, but just as I was about to face a third one, Liv came over.

"Beckahhh..." She was drunk. "Come dance with me and stop with the drinking. It's _borrringggg._" she said, pulling me by my hand.

And thus, (I just felt like using a fancy expression) we stumbled to the dance floor once again, this time slightly more drunk than before. And once again, we were dancing.

My (only slightly) confused mind remembered Mon's earlier disappearance. So I turned to her.

"WHO DID YOU SHAG?" I had to scream to be heard over the music.

"SOME RAVENCLAW" she answered, just as loudly. "QUITE FIT TOO."

I nodded in understanding, and went back to dancing, smiling flirtatiously at some guys who were looking my way, and grinding my body closer to the person behind me. I looked up at him. Curly brown hair and blurry face. I could work with that.

I managed to wink at him and kept dancing, pressing my body against his. Soon, his hands were on my hips and turning me around to face him. I kept dancing.

When he kissed me, I put my hands to the back of his neck. He tasted like firewhiskey (no surprise there), and his hair needed combing. As his tongue darted into my mouth, I bit his bottom lip slightly, still moving my hips to the music. I could feel his hand going up by back to the top of my dress, but when he was about to unzip it, I danced away. Gone.

I kept moving, getting further away from him, and soon dancing with another guy. Repeat process. Never once did I stop dancing.

-o0o-

Eventually, I did grow tired of the blurry faces and taste of firewhiskey that every one of them seemed to share, so I had a few more drinks to give me strength, before going to the door, casting a disillusionment charm on myself (told you I was good with alcohol), and before I knew it, I was crashing into my bed.

I was back in Hogwarts.

_AN: HELLOOOOOO, okay so thank you so much to everyone who has read this story, and to Bubbles23 thank you so much, and here's your update. I'm not very happy with this, but I need something to work on and yeahhh. Okay I'm awkward please don't judge me. MY POINT IS thank you for reading if you review you're awesome and I will love you forever and yayyyy. So yeah, byeee_


	3. Chapter 3

One of the many differences between Liv and I: she was a morning person. I was not.

However, we had it all figured out. She would get up, take her sweet time getting ready, and wake me up before going down to breakfast, while I got ready at supersonic speed.

On our first morning of Seventh Year, she did exactly that. I woke up to a bucket of ice-cold water, and a hand giving me some potion to help with the hangover of the night before (or that same morning).

I smiled in thanks as she called out an all-too-cheerful "good morning Sunshine, see you in breakfast" and closed the door behind her.

I looked at the clock. I had exactly twenty-one minutes till the first class... And the race begins.

I ran into the shower, soon jumping out of it, brushed my teeth while combing my wet hair, got dressed while my bed made itself thanks to a flick of my wand.

Then it was eyeliner, shoes and book bag (which Liv had thankfully already prepared for me) and I was out. All in a record time of thirteen minutes. Jealous, bitches? It's called being fabulous.

I ran to the Great Hall, where Liv handed me my timetable. I kissed her cheek and proceeded to pour myself some coffee.

"Beckah, remember how the new Defense teacher was going to come this morning?"

"Yeah" I answered. I didn't have Defence until the next morning.

"He was here earlier" Why was her voice so gentle all of a sudden?

"Hmmmm?"

"He looks like an idiot." She finally said.

"Damnit." I whispered.

Defense was my good class. It was my _favorite_ class. And I needed to have a good professor, not a stupid ass like last year. _Okay, calm down Rebeckah. Calm down. Just because he looks like an idiot doesn't mean anything. He's probably brilliant disguised as stupid. _I took a deep breath. He would be fine. Defense would be fine.

"But we have Defense together, so we can be partners and it won't be so bad." I heard Liv try to comfort me. I sighed, I was overreacting.

"You're right, I'll be fine." I told her, with a slightly fake smile, and a definitely fake optimism.

Yes, I'm overdramatic. Yes, I'm pessimistic. But I needed an O in my Defense NEWT, I needed to be perfect in Defense, because I wasn't perfect in anything else, and I wanted to be an Unspeakable. I wanted to be a kickass Unspeakable, I wanted to be a _perfect _Unspeakable. And so, I had to be perfect in Defense, and very near perfect in everything else.

And yes, it was stressful and hard, but it would be worth it, 'cause I would grow up and be awesome and amazing a so completely kickass as an adult that all of the teenage suffering would have been for something. Meanwhile, all the lazy ass people at Hogwarts who didn't give a popsicle about their grades would be working for me and regretting their not studying.

So yeah, there's my life plan. I get awesome grades, become an awesome Unspeakable, somehow change the world and make a cool discovery, and then, somewhere far away I'll fall in love and have a home and live happily ever after.

So, I'm a pessimist, but I'm also a dreamer. A hard combination, but whatever.

Now, back to my day. I didn't have Defense until the next day, so I spent all day in a bad mood and snapping at everyone, and skipping meals and generally being a bitch. And then I had Potions, which was awesome because I got to sit next to Naomi.

Naomi was a Ravenclaw, whom I had befriended last year when we were made partners in Potions. Thanks to her, the quality of my potions had increased, and ol' Sluggy's dislike of me had decreased.

Apart from being a genius potions-brewer, Naomi was a genuinely good person, and always managed to make me smile with her warm smile and weird, slightly geeky sense of humour.

So, when she she looked at me, big amber eyes twinkiling, and asked if I was "ready to take our potion brewing to NEWT level and beyond" (her precise words), I forgot all about my Defense teacher for a moment. I forgot that I was in a bad mood and ready to kill someone because of how hungry I was. I even forgot that my period was coming in a couple of days.

Oh joy.

-o0o-

That night, Liv and I had our beginning of the year sleepover, in which we basically stayed up till four in the morning talking and laughing, with just a teeny bit of crying. Ya know, hormones and all.

But too soon, Tuesday morning came, and I found myself glaring at my timetable bitterly, while sipping my coffee. I had History of Magic first thing, and then two straight hours of Defense.

I glanced at the teacher's table. The Defense Professor apparently always had breakfast early, and having skipped both lunch and dinner the day before, I hadn't even seen him yet. Cue to enthusiastic squealing. I'm so excited!

...

Not.

History of Magic was boring. No surprise there though, considering that we had an old ghost as a teacher and all, but for once I didn't want the class to end. Of course, it eventually did, and I dragged myself to the Defense classroom at a snail's pace, successfully managing to be late.

Whoopee doo.

I opened the door loudly (I was never really a fan of knocking) and muttered a simple "hello" before taking a seat next to Liv, smiling because at least she was there. The professor glared at me.

"And you are?"

"Rebeckah Malfoy, sir."

"Detention."

"What?"

"You were late. So you get a detention with me this Saturday at seven, Miss Malfoy."

I glared. What an arse.

"As I was about to say" the man droned, "you will have assigned seats in my classroom."

Well, shit.

He began calling names as I swore I would give myself up to the devil if I could have Liv as my partner. But no, she was with a girl from Hufflepuff who smiled brightly. Stupid Hufflepuffs and their stupid smiles and their general stupidity.

The Professor kept calling out names.

"Miss Malfoy" his cold, grey eyes caught mine. "With Mr. Potter."

WHAT THE ABSOLUTE FUCK?

Oh the little fuckweasel. The evil spawn. Now I definitely didn't like him, and he hadn't even started class yet.

Arsehole.

To get revenge, I calmly sat next to Potter and hid my anger. At least we were in the last row.

"Hi there, princess. Fine day for mischief, isn't it?" He smirked.

"Fuck off." I snapped

"Oooh touchy. What's got your knickers in a twist?"

"None of your business, Potter. Now shut up."

"Maybe I can untwist them for you?" The little pervert grinned.

I kicked his shin under the table, and he swore loudly and colorfully, which made me smirk happily.

"Mr. Potter, no swearing. Detention this Saturday at seven." Arsehole said. That made me smirk even more.

"But-"

"No complaining"

Potter huffed angrily, as Arsehole went on and on about the year's syllabus, the importance of NEWTs yadda yadda. I didn't listen due to the high levels of arseholiness in his blood. But I could already tell that class with him would be boring at best.

When the bell rang, I joined Liv in going out of the class, not giving Potter a second glance. She soon picked up on my bad mood, and started telling me all the start of the year's gossip, effectively cheering me up.

"-And then Alicia caught her boyfriend with another girl in a broom closet, so she transfigured his penis into a banana and now he's still in the Hospital Wing getting it fixed" She giggled.

_AN: HEYYY, so here's the third chapter for you guys. Thanks to Bubbles23 for your review, here's your chapter and I'm glad you liked the last one!_

_Also, merry christmas everyonee, I hope all of you are having a great holiday and yayyyyy._

_So, I'm going now, hope some of you like this, and maybe I can get a few more readers...?_

_Byeee_


	4. Chapter 4

Saturday afternoon found me dragging my feet towards Arsehole's office, where my detention would take place. And yes, I was in a bad mood (for a change). But really, who would want to spend their Saturday evening in _detention_?

However, my mood improved drastically when I felt someone jump onto my back, and wrap her arms around my neck. Why would someone jumping you improve your mood, you may ask. The answer is easy. It was Annie.

Annie was adorable. And she was short. Like, really short. Which was excellent, because I felt tall when I was with her. Of course, she was a third year, which was probably the reason why she was so short, but that didn't matter to me. And also, she was adorable. Cute-as-a-fuzzy-bunny-with-pink-ears adorable.

"Becky! I missed you. I have so much to tell you too!"

Did I mention how adorable she was?

She hopped off me, and I turned around to face her with a "Hey you little midget." At wich she hugged me again.

Adorable.

We sat crossed-legged on the middle of the corridor (*cough*adorable*cough*) as she told me all about her eventful summer in France with her cousins, and updated me on all the Hogwarts gossip, which she knew much more about than me.

Annie was a Slytherin too, but everyone adored her. Basically, she was a small version of Liv, with blue eyes and extreme shortness. And a lot of adorableness.

-o0o-

Too soon, it was fifteen past seven, which made me late for detention. I said goodbye to Annie and walked leisurely towards the second floor.

When I got to the office, Potter was already there, and Arsehole glared at me.

"You're late, Miss. Malfoy. Again."

"Do I look like I care?" I snapped.

He narrowed his eyes. Hehe. We had such fun together.

"You will write 'I will not be late' five hundred times"

Well dang it.

I took a deep breath as I sat down and picked up my quill, I had one long detention ahead of me, what with Arsehole's glare drilling a hole on the back of my neck and all.

After what seemed to be an eternity, but the clock said was an hour, my dear darling Arsehole professor got tired of watching us write his stupid and never ending lines, and left us to our misery.

Potter moved, reminding me that he was there with me, and pulled out his wand, muttering a spell that made the number of lines written on his paper double. Handy.

I wouldn't have hesitated to follow his example but A) I didn't know the damn spell and B) I was too proud to ask _Potter_ for help. So I kept on writing, the same line again and again, while the Potter The Greatest Jerk Of All Times watched me, with an amused smirk.

Stupid Potter.

-o0o-

And so the days went by, just as they always do.

Sleep. Wake up. Go to classes. Eat. Study. Go to a party and drink/Go to a party and smoke/Go to a party and dance/Go to a party and snog/Be with Liv/Everything at once. Sleep. Wake up.

My routine was interrupted every once in a while by

Option A) Talking to Scorpious. During one of our conversations I learned that Potter Jr.'s name was Albus, not Alfred. If you ask me, it was a pretty good guess, but Scorpious just laughed at me. Arrogant cousin of mine.

Option B) Potions with Naomi. In which I laughed and made things explode and laughed some more.

Option C) Talking to Annie The Adorable, and proudly being the big sister she never had.

Option D) Being annoyed by Sarah Nott, and being deprived of the satisfaction of breaking her nose.

Option E) Having nightmares. Going to the kitchens to drink tea. Talking to house-elves.

Option F) Feeling fat and skipping meals.

Option G) Going to detention _every single damn Saturday and having to watch Potter use a spell to not have to write lines while I sit there feeling as if my hand is about to fall off because of the amount of pain it's in._

Oh what fun it is to be me.

_AN: hello there, how are y'all doing? Well, here's chapter 4, hope you like it. Once again, thanks to Bubbles23 for her review, I know this chapter is short and not very good, so sorry. Also, I'M GOING TO VENICE TOMORROWWWWW, and won't be able to update til I come back. Anyways, thanks for reading and happy new year!_


	5. Chapter 5

**Saturday, November the 2nd**

**19:57**

Arsehole left, and Potter did that annoyingly useful spell again, and leaned back.

I kept writing.

"Need any help with that?"

"Not from you."

"Pride won't take you anywhere, princess"

"Shut up"

-o0o-

**Saturday, November the 9th**

**20:01**

"Can I help?"

"No"

"Your loss"

-o0o-

**Saturday, November the 16th**

**19:46**

"Don't want any help today either?"

"Nope"

"Suit yourself"

-o0o-

**Saturday, November the 23rd**

**19:52**

"Want any-"

"Fuck off Potter"

-o0o-

**Saturday, November 30th**

**20:03**

"Why not?"

"What?"

"Why won't you let people help?"

"Because"

"Just because?"

_Because it makes me weak._

"Look Potter, I don't need to give you any explanations. Now let me finish writing this"

Right then, Arsehole came back. Shit, I hadn't finished my lines. Shitshitshitshitshitshit.

"Are you two finished yet?"

"Yes Professor Malfoy, we both are. "

I looked down at my parchment, confused. It was finished. Which meant... that Jerk had done that spell for me. I looked up, but he had already left.

Damn you, Potter.

-o0o-

**Saturday, December the 7th**

**19:56**

Silence.

Damn you, Potter.

"Not going to thank me, princess?"

Damn you.

-o0o-

**Saturday, December the 14th**

**19:51**

"Thank you"

"My pleasure"

No taunts?

-o0o-

**Sunday, December 22nd**

**11:00**

I said goodbye to Annie, then Krista and finally Liv, as they boarded the train to go visit their families while I was one of the few that would stay at Hogwarts.

Happy Christmas, Rebeckah.

_AN: Hello, again. And finally. This chapter is extremely short, I KNOWWW, please don't hate me. Next chapter is gonna be nice and long and hopefully awesome. Thank you so much to everyone who has read this and to Bubbles23: thank you so extremely much for your review, and of course I don't expect you to review every chapter, I'm just grateful that you're reading and the reviews that you leave so THANK YOU SO SO MUCH. _

_Anyways, byeeee_

_Sonia._


	6. Chapter 6

_Dear Beckah,_

_How are you? What have you been up to? Please tell me you've at least been outside our dorm a few times. And have you started your homework? What about that Charms thingy? Because I'm gonna need some help... Anyways, tell me _everything.

_Me, well here I am. Being ignored by parents (of course) and it's Christmas! I almost forgot. MERRY CHRISTMAS DARLIIIN'! Okay so I got this dress from my cousin, and it's a purrfect for you, so as soon as I get back, it's all yours. Also _when are you going to give me that present_? I can't wait!_

_Now, to the gossip. Okay, so there was this big party Saturday, and well, stuff happened. I had sex with this guy and damn - he was good. But then the weird thing happened: after, instead of just going back to the party we stayed there, talking for hours, and laughing and joking and he was so sweet and funny. Seriously, I can't even remember what we talked about, but it was great. And get this - he's a Weasley. _

_The thing is, now I'm all worried and messy, because Matt and feeling guilty and all that. Damn, I need you. _

_So yeah, I'll see you in a few days, when we get back to Hogwarts. Miss you so much._

_Love,_

_Liv._

I couldn't help but sigh. Of course Liv was overthinking the whole Matt thing. Poor Liv...

And you guys don't know what I'm talking about, do you? Well I'll just tell you about it... Later.

In that moment I was staring at my reflection, getting ready to meet Scorpius, for what was going to be an _epic_ snowball fight.

I had spent the two and a half weeks of Christmas break catching up on my studying and on my reading, wandering every corner of the castle, talking to portraits and drinking tea. In other words: heaven. I had got a few letters from Liv and Annie, and in Christmas day I had woken up to a small but perfect pile of presents.

Scorp had stayed too (no wonder really, who would want to spend Christmas with Aunt Astoria?), so I got to spend some "quality time" with the little bugger. And what did I get out of it? Well, I found out that ickle fickle Scorp had a secret guuurrlfriendd, and spent the entire break making fun of him.

Why would this relationship be secret, you may ask? Well, that's the best part. Scorp, darling good person Scorp, was dating... Wait for it... ROSE WEASLEY.

Yes, a Weasley. I was already imagining the look in Aunt Astoria's face when she found out. And I was planning on having a camera on me when it happened, of course. *laughs evily"

Apparently, this Rose girl was Alfred's (or was it Albus?) cousin, and since Alfred (much better than Albus) was Scorp's best friend well, they met and suddenly POOF they're in love.

Apart from that, all that I knew about her was that she was a Ravenclaw (point in her favor), and that she was short (another point in her favor. We short people have to stick together). And, I had Scorp's promise that he would let me meet her soon. *cue to evil laughter* I was planning on torturing the girl.

-o0o-

Damn, it was already ten thirty. I was supposed to have met Scorp fifteen minutes ago, for our walk in the snow, to celebrate our last day of break.

Boots, hat, gloves, coat...

And I was down the stairs , and crashing into Scorp. At least I didn't have to look for him.

"Hey there Scorpy" I said, ruffling his hair "Ready to lose in the snowball fight?"

"Don't get your hopes up sis, you're _obviously_ going to lose."

I grinned as I slapped his forearm lightly. I loved it when he called me sis. "And why, pray tell me, will I be the one to lose?"

"Well because I have muscle, obviously."

"I don't know, I think having a girlfriend has made you a softie."

"When will you shut up about her?" He whined.

"_Never_."

We were outside, finally. I breathed in, out. The cool, fresh air hit my face. "Scorp, look"

"Look at what?"

"Don't you see it?"

"See what?"

"Our freedom. It's right here."

And I felt it. For once in a long time, I felt light and worriless. I felt like everything was all right, and I was on top of it all. I was free. There was a huge smile spreading across my face, and I could feel my heart beating wildly against my chest. All the pent up energy in me was suddenly beating through my body, and I could practically _feel_ it on my fingertips.

I needed to fly. But that was kinda not an option at the moment, so I went for the next best thing.

I ran.

Arms wide open, I ran and ran, hearing the crunch of my feet in the snow. And then I tripped over a pile of snow, and lay there, laughing my ass off as Scorp looked down at me in amusement.

Soon, he realized it was the perfect opportunity to kick snow onto me.

"Oh, you're so on, Scorp"

And then we were hiding behind trees, pouring snow down each other's backs, throwing snowball after snowball.

By the time our epic snowball fight was over (I won, of course) we were soaking wet and shivering, but still laughing.

-o0o-

The next day, Scorp and I were allowed to go the the Hogsmeade station, where we stood waiting for the train to arrive.

"Is it wrong that I'm lazy about everyone coming?" I asked.

"Yes, you're a horrible person."

"Jeez, I feel the love."

"Well you shouldn't, it isn't there."

"Saving it all up for your girlfriend, Scorpy?"

"Shut uuup."

Hehe.

Just then, the train came, whistling and full of cheerful students. Even though I did feel incredibly lazy about starting classes, I smiled as Annie ran over to hug me, and as first Liv and then Krista tackled me to the ground. I felt so... Good. It was weird, but I was planning on making the most of it.

And I did.

All through dinner, I laughed with Liv as she told me about her aunt Miriam, an eccentric muggle who collected wigs and took hip hop classes.

I skipped the welcome back party in the Gryffindor Common room and instead snuck up to the Ravenclaw Tower to say hi to Naomi and to be with Annie. I even met some of her third year friends, they were all so tiny and cute.

And then, I did go to the party, dressed in my very flattering sweatpants. But for once, I wasn't going to dance. I was going to check on Liv.

Let me make something clear; Liv never cried in public. It was part of the whole popular girl thing, she didn't show her emotions with these people. But I knew there were always exceptions, and times when her cheerfulness could break. Add to that the letter she had sent me plus a couple of drinks and well... I at least had to see how she was doing.

I was right. When I entered the Gryffindor Common Room, I found her curled up in an armchair, sobbing into a pillow. There were a few people around her, trying to help, completely unsuccessfully. Even as I watched, two girls left her side.

I walked towards her, when I noticed that she wasn't completely on her own. Beside her in the armchair there was a guy, looking awkward but like he wanted to help at the same time. Huh. I didn't stop to think about it though, I was concentrating on Liv.

I kneeled in front of her, softly placing my hand on her forearm.

"Liv, look at me."

As soon as I said it, she launched herself at me. "Beckah, I can't..."

"I know, I know." I was stroking her hair, like she had always liked. "But we can't talk about it here, lets go to the dorms?"

She just kept sobbing in response, but I took it as a yes, and helped her to her feet, which was slightly weird with how much talker she was than me and all. The boy that had been by her side helped me, and I gave him a small, honest smile in thanks, before guiding her to the portrait hole.

The dungeons were farther away than I thought, and Liv was getting more hysterical with every step, so I eventually sat her down on the stairs, and sat myself beside her.

For a while, she just cried.

Okay, children. The moment you've all been waiting for. It's story time.

Liv's life had never been easy. As a child, she had been horribly bullied in her muggle school and by children in her neighborhood. But being bullied, instead of making her be a bitch like it did to me, only gave her the resolve to be nice to everyone around her. She found out she was a witch, and lets just say that her parents were not thrilled. Although hurt by her parents' fear, she was excited, because she had a chance to start over, in a place where people wouldn't make fun of her. She and I became best friends in the first few days of our first year, but while I liked keeping to myself a lot, she soon got on well with most of the first years. From then on, her popularity increased with every day that passed, but surprisingly we always stayed best friends. A lot of popular people end up thinking that they are somehow superior from other, lesser people, but Liv always was nice and outgoing with everyone.

Then, in her fifth year, she met Matt, a year older than her. Matt was very quiet and had few friends. But he and Liv, they would spend hours together and never get bored or run out of things to say. Soon, he was kissing her and asking her out, and she was telling me how much she loved him and daydreaming in class. Me, I got to know Matt too, and I enjoyed watching them love each other more every day. It was beautiful.

But then, in the beginning of our sixth year and his seventh year, Matt got this weird illness. We didn't think it was very serious, not until he lost the ability to walk, and had to spend the end of his life in the Hospital Wing. In the one month until he died, Liv spent day and night in the Hospital Wing, eating with him, talking to him, skipping classes to visit him.

Until one day, we woke up and he didn't.

And Liv lost herself.

No one knew it though, no one had noticed when Matt had permanently moved to the Hospital Wing, and nobody noticed when he died. Some people thought that he had graduated early, or moved schools, but only Liv and I suffered from his death, and only I was there to help her.

Eventually, her old self started coming back, her wide smile and constant laughter. There were small changes though, the main one being her new goal of having sex with every single guy her age.

And I never said anything, because I knew she was just trying to forget him and feel loved. And she was getting better. Happier. But sometimes, the sadness comes pouring back.

"There's only one week left, Beckah."

I jumped at her voice. I had almost forgotten that she was there, I was too busy thinking about the past.

What was she talking about? Oh, right. A week. In a week, it would be a year since Matt's death and well, a year was a long time. I turned to look at her.

"Is that why you're like this? You're scared?"

"Terrified" she sniffed. "I feel like once a year has passed, I need to move on. And now that I might fancy Louis, I'm scared."

"But you do have to move on sometime, Liv. And now's as good a moment as any."

"But what if I don't want to move on?" Tears sprung to her eyes once again. "I feel so selfish if I move on."

"You don't have to forget him, Liv, or stop missing him. But you do have to think about yourself and let yourself be happy."

She leaned her head on my shoulder, and closed her eyes. "It's hard"

"I know."

_AN: Hey, long chapter here. I'm not sure if I'm proud of this or now, so I would really really love it if you guys told me what you think? I hate to beg, but I'm nervous. I want to thank you so much for reading, you are all beautiful people and I love you._

_Sonia_


	7. Chapter 7

Even after I had managed to get Liv to bed, I found it impossible to sleep. My previous good mood had vanished, and instead I was feeling restless and anxious. Well, at least Liv was done feeling better. Being asleep is always better than being awake.

Too bad I couldn't fall asleep.

After about an hour of sitting on my bed, I decided to go on a walk. It was only four in the morning, and the next day was a Saturday, so I had time to spare. I put a cozy jumper on and a warm pair of socks, thinking it would be better not to wear shoes and avoid excessive noise.

I tiptoed out of the room, Liv sleeping deeply, and soon I was roaming the dark halls of Hogwarts. I went up to the Astronomy Tower, then sat down in the Great Hall, hung out in the Room of Requirement and eventually headed towards the kitchens.

As I walked, I watched the shadows and listened to the silence that enveloped Hogwarts at night. It was so comforting and familiar that I eventually started walking with my eyes closed, following the path I always took to go to the kitchens. I knew not even the crazy caretaker would be out and about so late, so I had nobody to worry about.

Just as I was thinking this, I slammed into... Something, and crashed to the floor.

As I opened my eyes, I found myself beside three boys, which I quickly recognized.

Boy 1: A redhead, therefore a Weasley, whose name was Frodo or Frudox or something of the sort.

Boy 2 I instantly recognised. It was the guy that was with Liv when she was crying, the one with the deer-caught-in-the-headlights look about him, and probably the Weasley Liv had told me about.

And, last but definitely not least, was Boy 3: Potter. Of course.

"Well, what are you three twats doing here?"

Frudox grinned. Deer-caught-inblahblahblah (too long of a name. Lets call him Deer-boy) blinked. And dear dear Potter smirked, of course.

"I could ask the same thing, princess"

I gaped at him, realizing that I hadn't talked to him since the whole apology episode before Christmas break, and realizing that although his typical annoying comment was along the lines of what he always said, I wasn't as irritated as I normally was. Hmmm. Probably the sleep deprivation.

"Yeah well I asked first"

Am I mature or what?

"I asked second"

Though he wasn't one to talk.

"Whatever, Potter."

I glanced back at Deer-boy, who was staring at me curiously. Friendly Rebeckah mode: on.

"Hi, you're the guy that was with Liv before, aren't you?"

"Yes"

"Well what's your name?"

"Louis Weasley"

I sat up, looking at Deer-boy Weasley again. Even though his hair was more of a copper colour, he did have the air of happiness and general niceness about him.

I realized I had been silent just a minute too long, so I opened my mouth to say something nice and intelligent.

"And what exactly are your intentions with Liv?"

Deer-boy's mouth fell open. I guess I was being slightly blunt. Oops. Blame it on the sleep deprivation.

"W-what do you mean?"

"Don't bullshit me, you know exactly what I mean. But now's really not the moment to be talking about this, what with these two dimwits here and all, so we shall talk some other day, young man."

He blinked a bit more before nodding silently.

"I'll be going now. You guys have fun." I was getting up, and about to head towards to kitchen once again, before Frudox spoke up.

"Wait. Aren't you supposed to be like, a bitch?"

That caught my attention. "What?"

"I mean, you're being kind of nice, in a weird type of way. I though you were the cold and mean type."

Potter spoke up. "Oh that's just a front, mate. She's really a decent person, but she just never lets people see it."

Frudix seemed contemplative. "Huh. That could be true, but why would she hide her decency?"

Potter smirked at that. "Well, I'm going for the tragic childhood theory, and now she won't let anyone in, but I'm still working it out."

"I'm right here, you know." I eventually said. Their psychoanalysis of me was making me feel uncomfortable and somehow invaded. Why were these guys suddenly spewing theories about the reasons behind my behavior?

Finally, it hit me. They were drunk. It all made sense. They must have all been at the party.

"Go to bed, boys."

And I left.

The kitchens were probably my favorite place in Hogwarts (apart from my dorm and the Forest, of course). I loved the smell of yumminess, the cute house elves running about, the sound of washing plates... It was just perfect.

As soon as I walked in, Ditz came bouncing excitedly as she asked me what I wanted. Tea, please.

I sat down in the corner of one o the tables, and seconds later Ditz was back, bringing me a huge mug, which smelled delicious.

"Thank you, Ditz. What tea is it?"

"Mint, Miss Beckah. Made it myself."

I took a sip, and smiled at her. "Why don't you sit down? Tell me what you did on Christmas."

She smiled, a bit uneasy at having to stop working, but most House elves were sleeping, and the ones who weren't had nothing to do, so after a few looks around she sat opposite of me.

"Well you were here, Miss Beckah. I just cleaned and cooked."

I waved her off. "Oh but I'm sure something interesting happened."

I mischievous grin appeared on her face. "Well I did find some interesting drawings..."

That was one of the things I loved about Ditz. Being one of the youngest that worked at Hogwarts, she had a mischievous side that the other house elves didn't have. And she was really cute, too.

"Oooh tell mee"

"Well a boy from Ravenclaw has a trunk full of portraits of Professor Brams. I'm pretty sure he's in love."

"Aww that's just cute."

"You won't think it's cute when I tell you most of them are nudes."

At this, I collapsed into a fit of giggles, while Ditz complained about how badly done they were.

"Poor boy though, suffering from a forbidden love."

At that moment, the door opened, Potter Sr. walking in. "Mister James!" a few elves shouted, rushing to his side. I stared in shock, how did Potter know this place? This was _my_ place.

When he turned around, he stared at me. "What are you doing here?"

"What are _you_ doing here?"

"I always come here"

"Well how come I've never seen you here before?"

"I'm normally sleeping around this time. I usually come a bit earlier."

"Then why are you here today?" I asked.

"One of my roommates was shagging in the dorm. Wouldn't let us go in. So I took a sobering potion and tadah, here I am."

"How nice. I'll be going then." I said, getting up.

"No need to, princess. Finish your tea, it smell delicious."

I considered. On one hand, going to bed. On the other, finishing my excellent tea, but putting up with Potter.

I sighed, sitting down again. Tea would be the death of me one day.

Potter smirked, as he asked Ditz for some ice cream. "So what brings you here? Couldn't sleep?"

"Yeah"

"I didn't see you at the party tonight."

"That's because I wasn't there"

"Aw, that's too bad. We missed you, princess."

"I'm sure you did."

Silence reigned after that, in which I sipped my tea and Potter devoured ice-cream. It made me feel weird. It wasn't an awkward silence, but the lack of this awkwardness was awkward. Basically, it was awkward because it wasn't awkward, as awkward as that sounds.

I was trying to think of something slightly intelligent to say, but Potter beat me to it.

"Scorpious Malfoy is your cousin, right?" Not what I was expecting but okay.

"Yes." I nodded curtly.

"Have you known him for a long time?" This was starting to sound creepy. Still, I answered honestly.

"Seven years."

"Do you know him well?" I was done.

"Why are you interrogating me?" He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly.

"Well umm... I really don't think... It's not in my place to tell you..." Oh, maybe it was because of Scorp's love affair with the Weasley girl.

"Cut the crap, Potter. Is this somehow related to a younger cousin of yours?"

"Yes...? Are you talking about what I'm talking about?"

"I don't know, maybe it would help if you told me what you were talking about" I snapped, getting annoyed.

"Well I can't tell you if you don't know it already."

"Okay now this is just silly. Why don't we call Ditz, we both tell her what we're talking about and if it's the same thing she tells us?" I finally answered.

"But the Ditz would find out, and nobody's supposed to know."

"She probably already knows, Potter. Ditz knows everything."

"Fine."

And so, we called Ditz over. We each whispered something to her, and when we asked her if it was the same thing she nodded, making me smile smile up at Potter.

"So you know about the love affair. Who told you?"

"Rosie."

Oh, so they were close. How sweet. "Well I hope _Rosie _treats Scorp right, or I'm going to kick her arse."

"I'll do the same thing to him if he hurts her."

An uncomfortable silence ensued, as we glared at each other, like two wolves protective of their puppies.

Suddenly, he deflated, an easy smile spreading over his face. I had never seen him smile like that before. It made him look all innocent and nice and sweet, but I knew better; he was a devil inside.

"So tell me about yourself, Miss Malfoy." He said in a creepy angelic voice.

Well two could play at this game.

"There's not much to it, really. I'm a sweet little girl." He leaned back in his chair, watching me almost carefully.

"You're sarcastic."

"Yes"

"You have a sense of humor."

"Sometimes."

"We're in a lot of detentions together."

"Your point, Potter?"

"We should be friends."

First, I choked on my tea. Then, I stared at him, mouth open and eyes wide. Finally, I realized he was actually kidding, so I started laughing loudly.

"I'm not kidding."

"Right"

"We would be great friends!"

"But... why?"

"It'd be fun!"

"What do you get out of it?"

"The pleasure of your company."

"What do _I _get out of it?"

"The pleasure of my company."

Insert snort here.

"The whole idea is pure bollocks."

"Will you be my friend or not?"

"I'm a bad decision maker under pressure."

"And the decision is...?"

"Fine. I'll be your friend."

-o0o-

"You're kidding, right? I can't believe you're asking my favorite color. How cliche is that?" I could feel laughter bubbling at the back of my throat, because of the pure absurdity of the situation.

"Shut uup. I like cliches." His eyes were wide and sparkly, and the huge lopsided grin I had gotten familiar with over the past two hours was again making an appearance.

"Goodnight, James. Or good morning. Or whatever." I sighed, dragging my feet toward the entrance of the Common Room. He laughed at the patheticness of me.

"Don't I get a hug? In celebration of our friendship?" I turned back to see his childlike grin again.

"You're a cliched idiot."

I did hug him though.

-o0o-

_AN: Hello peoplees. I hope this chapter was halfway good, and thank you all so much for reading, seriously. I haven't been getting many reviews, but just knowing you guys are reading is great so THANK YOU. Anyway, byeeeee_


	8. Chapter 8

The morning after the start of my friendship (I still shudder in fear at the thought)with Potter, I shook Liv awake, with a wide smile.

"Livvyyy, wake up! It's time I gave you your Christmas present, don't you think?"

She yawned before nodding enthusiastically, eyes suddenly wide open. "_Finally._"

I grinned as I reached under the bed, and took a basket out, Liv looking at me quizzically through it all. I pushed the basket into her arms, and she slowly lifted the corner of the green blanket that was covering the basket's contents.

She smiled wide when she saw the small grey kitten that lay sleeping, and her dimples made an appearance, the childisness of her smile contrasting deeply with the tear tracks trailing down her cheeks.

"Look at it!" she gasped. "It's a kitten! It's adorable! Oh my God!"

She gasped in delight when the kitten stirred, lazily opening its eyes. "Look at its eyes. They're _green_." Giddy laughter bubbled from her mouth, her eyes sparkling with mirth as she looked up at me. "Is it a girl or a boy kitten? What's its name? Oh Rebeckah, thank you so so much."

"It's a female. Her name is Alya, which actually means ,isn't it?"

She smiled her dimpled smile again, as she stroked the kitten softly.

-o0o-

Once in the Great Hall, I marched up to the Gryffindor table and poked Louis Weasley's shoulder. He turned to look at me all wide-eyed and adorable, deer eyes questioning.

"Deer boy. Come with me."

"Did you just call me Deer boy?"

I dragged him outside, and proceeded to question him about his intentions toward Liv, all the while ignoring his grimaces of pain at the most awkward questions, and his adorable blushing every now and again.

Even though he didn't say much, the conversation (I should probably call it interrogation) was very enlightening.

Louis Weasley is very cute. He is planning on asking Liv out soon, and I persuaded him to do so with some flowers (wanted him to serenade her - he didn't agree). He's James Potter's cousin and one of his best friends. He plans on going into Law after school. Has a very good relationship with parents and family. He is a Gryffindor. Strong passion for Quidditch. Handsome.

He is Liv's future husband.

-o0o-

Once Deer boy successfully escaped me, I ran into Rose Weasley, which was quite fortunate, as I was quite liking the whole scary policewoman thing. I got a bit distracted when I noticed that she was wearing a _very _nice skirt.

Proceeded to talk about clothes for half an hour. Conversation somehow changed to books.

Forgot to ask about Scorpius, but it wasn't necessary. I think I'm jealous of him.

WHY DOES HE GET TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH SUCH A PERFECT INDIVIDUAL WHILE I SIT HERE FEELING UNLOVED AND SNOGGING RANDOM GUYS OUT OF BOREDOM.

GAH.

Bitter Rebeckah.

But Rose is lovely.

-o0o-

Spent the rest of the month studying. And studying. And studying.

My hate towards Ol' Sluggy Slughorn grew when he assigned us a five-foot essay on the uses of some ingredient or another. FIVE-FOOT!

And then, the pathetic Defense teacher decided to test us once a week, _and _continue with the habit of giving me detentions every Saturday. Fucking Arsehole.

I _hate _studying. Studying made me cranky.

Liv was feeling sick, apparently. Her usual love for chicken suddenly disappeared, and she claimed it smelt "weird". Seriously, hormonal teenagers these days. Worry about Liv's sickness and annoying eating habits made me even _more_ cranky.

Through all of this, Potter surprisingly kept his status as my friend during the whole month. We talked in the corridors every now and then, and even ran into each other in the kitchens a few times. Having him as my friend actually provided a bit of a relief from my drama-filled-January. He was actually quite nice, and funny. Also, he seemed to be getting more handsome with every day. No fair.

-o0o-

When the first of February finally came, I literally felt my shoulders sag in relief.

February was going to be peaceful, stressfree, happy. Full of rainbows and lollipops, and smiles and blue skies.

I woke up feeling as if I were in a TV commercial. Birds were chirping, trees were making oxigen, children were being born, my heart was beating...

Life was _good. _And I hadn't even gotten out of bed yet.

I didn't even feel fat.

All of that changed however, when I went into the bathrrom, and found Liv curled up in the corner of the bathroom, crying her eyes out and sobbing soundlessly.

What was wrong? She had been okay about Matt lately. Her parents were still ignoring her. Louis had asked her out... But nothing _horrible _had happened, right? Right.

Then why the hell was she crying like that?

I did the logical thing, and asked her.

She told me.

Fucking hell.

February was not going to be a good month. At all.

_AN: hello, darlings. Thank you to anyone reading, I love you so so much. This chapter is short and weird and crappy, I don't even know why I'm trying to keep writing anymore. Anyways, would very much love a review?_

_Byee_


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